Hello there, cheeky! So you want to hear some fun ways on how to have sex in hostels without annoying fellow hostel-goers? Oo-err!
Let's not pretend that sex is definitely happening in hostels, whether you're the one joining in or not. And why not? It's fun, natural and a big part of backpacking life.
Come on, then, let's take a look at some tried and tested ways to do the deed as low-key as possible…
Enjoy Hostel Sex in these ways...
- 1. Opt for a private room
- 2. Bathroom antics
- 3. When the dorm is empty…
- 4. Choose a party hostel
- 5. Check for cameras first!
- 6. Head to the right country
- 7. Be realistic, be honest
- 8. Let’s talk about common areas
- 9. Wait until late night/early morning
- 10. Mix up the positions
- 11. Head to the garden
- Summary
1. Opt for a private room
Let’s get the most obvious and boring one out of the way… because yes, most hostels do offer private rooms, don’t you know! This is easily a sure-fire way of being able to enjoy sex in hostels without annoying people. However, it’s also likely to lose the excitement of getting caught...
2. Bathroom antics
Whilst not everyone’s cup of tea, the hostel bathroom is up there for being one of the best places to “do it”. The shower is obviously more enjoyable as opposed to a toilet cubicle. But well, whatever floats your...uhm... boat!
Psst! Just bear in mind that bathrooms tend to echo sounds quite well, so err, try and keep the noise down.
3. When the dorm is empty…
Rather than saying outright: “DON’T HAVE SEX IN DORM ROOMS”, we think there’s room for discernment here. If, for example, you’re checked into a 4-bed dorm and before heading out for the evening it’s only you're obviously staying there, why not bring your lover back after a fun night out?
Of course, there might be a late night check-in arriving. Avoid shock and embarrassment by choosing a bottom bunk and hanging a sheet for added (yet somewhat obvious) privacy.
4. Pick a party hostel
Without saying too matter-of-factly that party hostels = getting laid, there is a higher possibility due to the nature of party vibes. Let’s face it, you’re only going to book a party hostel because you’re keen on a fun time, right?! Cocktails are flowing, games are rolling and tensions are flying high… let’s just say that people are likely to be less shocked at the sound/sight of sex at a party hostel than they would be at a quiet, boutique hostel that attracts families and older travellers.
Read: 10 Types of Hostels on Hostelz.com to discover
5. Check for cameras first!
Seriously, make sure you do this because almost every hostel has them! Hostel staff are very aware of backpacker shenanigans and may purposely seek out raunchy footage as a reason to boot you out or shame you. Don’t give them the opportunity, and don’t submit yourself to becoming an accidental p*rn star.
Just so we’re clear: Cameras are in hostels for security purposes, not to perve on you. Phew. Here's more on Hostel Safety.
6. Head to the right country
Hostel sex is almost expected in certain countries like Thailand, especially in party destinations like Bangkok, Koh Phangan (full moon party) and Pattaya. I mean, it goes without saying that the level of partying that occurs here leads to plentiful sexual experiences. So, head to Thailand and dramatically lower your risk of annoying people by having hostel sex.
7. Be realistic, be honest
It’s easy to get caught up in worrying about annoying people in the hostel, but what about annoying the person you’re actually having sex with? This is definitely possible, too! That’s why we suggest…
- Being honest about your intentions (as in: “I just want casual sex”)
- Being upfront about your sexual health
- Not twisting sex into a soul mate or marriage situation (calm down!)
- Not avoiding the condom conversation (use one!)
Whilst at the moment all is fun and flirty, don’t ruin it the next day by getting all weird and clingy.
8. Let’s talk about common areas
Alright, so it’s no secret that hostels are a social accommodation, and they come with shared spaces. You’re wondering; “can I have sex in the common areas?”
Yes…and no. We can say firmly that the kitchen is off limits, always. Just… eww. As for the main common/living area? It’s difficult to be discreet, there may be cameras, and there’s a respect-for-other-guests issue. Separate cinema room onsite? Better option. Outdoor swimming pool? Probable. Rooftop? Absolutely!
Basically, we’re not condoning or encouraging sex in hostel common areas. Butt! With a bit of consideration, sneakiness and good timing, it’s not totally out of the question.
9. Wait until late night/early morning
Late afternoon and early evening is generally a no-go when it comes to sex. People are returning to the hostel from a big day out, eating dinner and getting ready for the evening of indoor drinks/games or hitting the local nightlife scene. The hostel is bustling and you’re sure to be disturbed! Best to wait for people to head out into town or go to bed.
Similarly, the early hours of the morning are a great time when most people are in a deep snooze. The only time this may not work is if you're staying in a working hostel when everyone's up and about for an early start.
10. Mix up the positions
In order to keep the noise down and reduce obvious signs that you’re getting it on, be creative with sex positions! It’s actually a super cool time to try something new, or experiment with a position you may never try otherwise.
Also… slow it down. Whilst we know spontaneous sex is often hot and sweaty, the art of slowing down can be just as sexy (and a whole lot more quiet).
11. Head to the garden
If your hostel has a garden, perfect! As the night lingers on, fellow hostellers are likely to head inside to the common area or hang out in their rooms. Sex outside offers up so much more to the experience; stars, soft grass, the sounds of nature… lovely.
Summary
So, as you can see, it's quite possible to have great sex in hostels without annoying people. All it takes is a little awareness and planning (without completely taking away the spontaneity) and you're set to make fun memories.
Not sure sex in hostels is for you, after all? Fair enough. Here are 9 Simple Ways to Make Friends in Hostels that don't include taking your clothes off.
Whilst you're here, you may want to check out these further 17 Tips for Sleeping and Staying in Hostels.
No matter what; have fun!
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